Reorganizing my life

Reorganizing. I'm always reorganizing my home, my stuff and my life. I started this process once again two weekends ago with the realization that I will be right back here where I started. I suppose that I hang on to things because I think I will need them later or I don't want to be wasteful. Sometimes it's just hard to let go- you know? The truth is that I am stuck in the same place because I may not be as thrifty as I think, a sentiment I struggle with on my own every other week or month, it seems. The husband isn't so concerned as we both earn a paycheck doing what we do, but I'm so ready to move forward with another chapter of our lives, which will probably involve me reorganizing again in some way, shape, or form.

I once read somewhere that cleaning and organizing can be therapeutic, just like writing or doing anything that requires your complete focus. This was definitely one of those therapeutic experiences, especially since I should have been doing my homework. I must admit that I too cave into social pressures. Here I am going to school and working on a degree, paying a mortgage on a home, and living a rather normal life, aside from being a Sailor which is completely unconventional. I struggle with the polar opposite sides of myself, wanting to do nothing at all at times and knowing that the life I rarely mention in too much detail is inexplicably burdensome and mostly irrelevant to anybody who might still be reading this here blog.

Sunday brunch

Resumed the monthly Sunday brunching this past Mothers Day. I've been feeling guilty lately for being so busy with work and school, two things which would certainly be acceptable excuses for missing get-togethers in my mom's eyes. I didn't bother to explain any possible upcoming changes in my life because it would be too much for my parents to comprehend: they seem to have a mental roadblock when it comes to understanding my life as a Sailor. This year we also sent my mother-in-law a card and flowers. I did try to call her, but ended up leaving her a voice message instead. I even remembered to text my two sister-in-laws and two best friends "happy mothers day" messages because I am not a "phone person" and couldn't speak to all of them during the course of the day, not to mention the road trip conversation with my husband that was about to happen in the car. This was the better part of my day, since an unfinished, much-procrastinated final paper was waiting for me back at home.

Mother's Day last year 

Speaking of dreams

Lately, my husband and I have been talking about our plans when we leave the military. I once dreamed of opening my own little hole-in-the-wall coffee shop, and then through blogging, I've wondered if I could try my hand in selling second-hand goods. It's amazing that any person can see their dream come to fruition in this here land, no matter how small or big that dream may be. It's been challenging to concentrate on schoolwork as the excitement of working towards my dreams fills me up with so much joy and optimism. The one dream that the husband and I could work on together is opening up our own microbrewery, although craft beer is more his love than it is mine. What started as a hobby for him has turned into not only a  past-time but a possible business venture. I'm looking forward to this unchartered part of our lives, retirement before mid-life and possibly new careers. It might seem like a decade away, but time has passed so quickly. Before we knew it, we were saying goodbye to our youths, separate moments in our lives when we believed that our dreams could wait. 

It's been awhile

I pulled this photo out from a month or so ago. I had reworn this top again just because I haven't worn it in awhile. It happens to be quite versatile, but I just never really knew it. I also never really knew the actual work it takes to document and plan outfits. I realized that I just needed to do it for several reasons like getting to know everything in my closet and how everything can be maximized to go together. This is still a learning process, and I probably will never truly be "over it" as much as I am getting too busy to do it with any consistency.

top (reworn)-Old Navy $12// pants (reworn) 1+ yrs old- F21 $11//shoes (reworn)- Charlotte Russe $9//necklace (reworn)- F21 $5//purse (old)-Urban Outfitters $15

Lately, I've been feeling exhausted with everything that I have to do, and so I've decided to cut back on extra blogging activities. Though I care about keeping the interest of those people who truly want to read what I have to say, I also want this place to remain my creative journal, a freely evolving space that is representative of all the parts of who I am.

Tasting at Helms

This past Friday I worked a fundraising event at the Padres game serving beer for beer fest and had the pleasure of meeting the co-founders of Helms Brewery, who happen to have past connections to the military service themselves. Unable to taste any of the craft beer we served that evening, I made it my personal mission to drag my husband and friend Kristen with me to try the popular "Beeruccino" and "Hop the RIPA", highly recommended by the crowd of fans which gathered at our booths for both beer and baseball. You can guess that the "Beeruccino" has a smooth, deep coffee flavor, while the RIPA is a rare red, almost sweet-tasting IPA. Although my favorite this evening became Goosefoot Ginger, which says a lot since I don't normally have the taste buds for any beer.  Of course, we followed the tasting with Korean barbecue from nearby, not forgetting to take a growler of the husband's new favorite home with us, the Wicked As Sin IPA. I'm sure it's already half empty as he generously shares his beer with friends who may visit announced or occasionally unannounced.

I enjoy these days as if they were my last

I couldn't wait to steal an hour at the beach this last Sunday. I promised myself that I'd go  more often this year, especially since it is only a few minutes from my house. There is a lot of catching up with life that I still need to do, and it won't be long before I will return to a ship. Only a few Sailors can avoid sea duty, and I'm certainly not one of them.

I can count the many Sundays I've missed, if I tried, whilst out to sea or deployed. While I'm at it, I can probably count all the days I've been at sea away from civilization. There were many missed birthdays, anniversaries, funerals, and times that loved ones may have needed me to be there for them, yet I couldn't be there. These missed moments translate into years. Perhaps this is why any leisure activity, any moment spent with friends and family, time spent alone, or any Sunday in general, means so much to me. I truly cherish all the  ordinary events in my life, because I'm so use to what isn't normal and what doesn't come naturally to me- standardization, rules, uniformity, schedules, and plans. My life is a paradox of who I am and what I am not. There is no blame or regret, just an amazing, hopefully humble, feeling of satisfaction knowing that I've done the things I've done and sacrificed so much along with an immense feeling of gratification when enjoying simple pleasures.....